That's Not My Name
by Locus Solus
Summary: NOT YAOI. Zoro has a fever, Sanji has to assist him with his hygiene needs and then all is shot to hell. It's not comedy/humor, in case you were wondering.
1. Fuck Me Three Ways to Sunday

Sanji was just about turn and help the man get into the bath -resist the shudder- when a fist came flying and connected with his jaw. Sanji took a startled step back, a hand reflexively covering the spot where he had been struck as he stared reproachfully at Zoro.

"What the _hell_ was that for-?" He cut off when he saw the glazed over look in Zoro's eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Zoro demanded.

Strange, the swordsman seemed to be perfectly capable of speaking clearly, maybe it was just the sickness that made him look the way he did.

"What do you mean 'what am I doing here?'?" Sanji asked, slightly angry that the swordsman had hit him. "I was told, no, _ordered_ to help you clean yourself, you jackass."

"Lies!"  
Sanji rolled his eyes. "Whatever, just get in so we can get this over with." Once again, Sanji had to resist shuddering.

Zoro seemed to looking for something at his waist before he began to glance about.

"What?" Sanji blinked. "Miss your toys? Don't tell me you need your swords to take a bath-"

"Where have taken my swords, Helmeppo?"

Sanji bristled. Helmeppo? Who or what the fuck was Helmeppo? The name even _sounded_ unattractive. Either way, it sounded like one fuck-tard of a name and he certainly would not stand being called _Helmeppo_.

"Oi," Sanji said. "What did you just call me?"

"Where have you put my swords, bastard??" Zoro swung another punch.

Sanji frowned as he ducked the blow. What the hell was Zoro's problem? Did he just get that aggravated when separated from his swords?

"Look, I don't have your swords, marimo," Sanji said. "They're down in the men's quarters where _you_ left them. Okay?"

"You lie."  
"Why would I lie?"

"Because you always lie, Helmeppo!"  
Sanji felt a chill run down his spine, there was that name again. Helmeppo. Tired of the swordsman's games, he tricked the man into falling head first into the large tub, clothes and all, by side-stepping his next swing.

"Now you just take your bath like a good little boy so this can be done as soon as possible," Sanji said. "And so I don't have to deal with you anymore."  
Sanji turned to sit by the door and wait when he felt a hand suddenly seize the back of his shirt and give a quick yank. His feet flew out from underneath him on the slippery floor and he landed flat on his back, knocking the wind from him. Now he was becoming rather livid with the man for trying to provoke a fight from him when Sanji didn't _want_ to fight right now.

"Stupid marimo," he winced as he sat up. "What the hell is your-"

A punch to the face cut him off. Once again he was shocked that the swordsman had struck him out of nowhere. He was dazed by how hard the blow was. It didn't seem like the usual round abouts they had. This punch felt cold, like a brick to his skin. There had been more than just bone and muscle behind it. There had been actual _anger_ and _hate_. Before he could recover from his stupor, he felt the man grip his bangs tightly and slam him into the ground. Automatically his hand went to the swordsman's wrist, clutching it in an attempt to make him let go. It felt like Zoro was trying to scalp him.

"If you won't tell me, then I'll make you tell me!"

"Look, I'm not this Helmeppo person you think I am!" Sanji grimaced. "So if this is some sick joke, you had better-"  
Zoro pulled the blond up half way by his bangs. Sanji squeezed Zoro's wrist to the point where he couldn't feel his own fingers. There was a threatening look in the green-haired man's eyes.

Sanji gasped. "Wait, what are you-"  
His sentence was cut off as the swordsman drove him back into the tile with such tremendous force that he once again became winded. His head throbbed in pain. Something wasn't right. Zoro never fought him like this before. What the hell did the man think he was doing? Why was he suddenly attacking him?

"Tell me!"  
He pulled him up again and slammed him back down. Over and over again, yelling "Tell me! Tell me!" and Sanji was too dazed and breathless to resist. As his head hit the tile repeatedly he swore he heard it begin to crack. Maybe that was his skull starting to shatter.

Sanji felt his arm raise of its own accord and slam forcefully into the swordsman's side, winding the other. Zoro released him with a grunt but Sanji found himself to be hurting more than he thought he would. He forced his mind to block out the pain but his body didn't seem to want to cooperate. The lack of air in his lungs deprived his muscles of the oxygen they needed to function and to allow him to escape. It was like he had lost control over part of his body as he struggled in vain to get away. He was gasping pitifully as he fought to stand or at least crawl away. Zoro's legs suddenly appeared in front of him as he realized that the man was now standing over him.

"Thought you could get away, Helmeppo?"

Zoro grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled him up to almost eye level. Sanji couldn't feel his legs as they dangled limply, still touching the ground but unable to support him. Like a kitten in its mother's jaws. Minus the love.

The swordsman briefly made eye contact him before dealing one mother of punches to his gut, sending him flying back into the small steps of the bath. It felt as if everything inside him had been crushed and or squeezed. Every bit of air was gone, leaving him gaping like a fish. The water was still running and was beginning to pour out of the sides of the tub now.

"I wasn't going toy kill you, since you know where my swords are."  
Sanji's eyes widened as he felt Zoro's fingers latch around his throat.

"But since you're refusing to tell me, I may as well just get rid of you now. You're in the way."

For the first time in a face off against the other man, Sanji felt his heart race in a way he didn't want to accept. When he usually fought with Zoro his heart beat with adrenaline and a little bit of ecstasy. Every kick or punch made his heart beat faster and faster until he thought it would suddenly stop from the exertion. But now, his heart was pounding out of fear. It was fear that coursed through his veins now at the glimmer of murderous intent in Zoro's eyes. Zoro was actually serious. His expression promised death and death was what Zoro was going to deliver. Sanji was suddenly afraid of this Zoro, whatever had suddenly possessed him to turn like this.

Next thing Sanji knew his airway was being threatened. Zoro had both hands around his throat and was choking him. Sanji struggled to get him to let go, scratching at Zoro's arms, anything to just breathe again. They knocked over whatever stood in their way and reeled this way and that. Zoro slammed him in to the walls trying to get him pinned in one place, but the tile floor was too slippery for that. Sanji finally found release when they both slipped and fell, but he cracked his head so hard on the tile he thought he was going to pass out.

"Shit..." he cursed.

Then, finally, someone knocked on the door.

A savior!

To Sanji's dismay, he found that his voice had suddenly decided not to work. He scrambled to reach the door. His efforts grew wild as a strong hand seized his leg and dragged him back. He scrabbled uselessly at the tile floor, trying to escape still, trying to shout out for help. All that managed to escape him was a dry hack. He suddenly found the swordsman looming above him once more.

"Sanji?"

As much as he would've liked the soft voice it to be Zoro's, it wasn't. It was Usopp's. Usopp had come to check on them!

Before he could gather his own voice, a single hand clutched his throat, fingers curved around it as held him firmly as he was dragged to the bath tub.

Oh, fuck a duck and screw a kangaroo.

"Say goodbye, Helmeppo."

"I'm not-!"  
Then he was plunged into the water and held there. He kicked and thrashed all he could, splashing more and more water out of the tub and onto the floor.

He had nightmares like this. Being held under water by something, either seen or unseen, it didn't matter. It looked exactly as it did in his nightmares; the rippling water, the bursts of bubbles, and the eyes. Eyes that stared down at him with a cold and heartless look. It wasn't nearly as frightening in his nightmares as it was in real life, but it seemed quite familiar. The fear and panic. The only difference was that the one holding him down was a friend.

What the devil had gone wrong? Zoro is actually trying to kill me! And for what?? Because the dumb marimo head had left his swords in the men's quarters?? That's always a great reason to kill someone, especially a friend! I swear on all good food, if I make it out of this I'm shoving my foot so far up his ass he's going to _taste_ leather.

Desperate to get Zoro to release him, he scratched as hard as he could at his hands or any sensitive part of his arms he could think of. Then again, Zoro wasn't a sensitive man, so that plan was lost from the get go. He scrabbled at his own throat in effort to pry Zoro's calloused fingers away but to no avail.

He had a single brief moment of respite as he managed to push himself up for one quick second and gave a shout with all the strength he had left.

"USOPP!!!" he shrieked.  
Zoro placed his other hand over Sanji's throat now and forcefully pushed him back down. The added strength now made it impossible to get back up, he was too weak. Sanji hadn't had a chance to take a breath beforehand and the need to breathe was over taking him. Soon his mind would force him to try and draw in air, that's when the water would flood in. He would suffocate and drown at the same time. The smooth surface of the tub made it difficult to reach around to kick Zoro on any part of his body he could reach. Not to mention there was nowhere for him to grip even for a split second to use as leverage. He was doomed for. His vision was growing dim now as he tried to find Zoro.

Fuck me three ways to Sunday, he's actually going to kill me!

Now that he had finally run out of oxygen his body was automatically trying to draw in air, but he only swallowed water. His legs jerked and twitched as he could not get the element he needed to keep fighting. The world was growing dark now and he could just barely see Zoro through the rippling water. A hand reached up and grabbed the sleeve of his shirt before slowly growing lax and resting against the edge of the tub unmoving.


	2. You Don't Remember?

Usopp entered the bathhouse a little cross. He wasn't happy that Nami had ordered him to check on the two in the middle of an experiment. She had complained about a loud racket and wanting them to keep it down. Usopp didn't give a damn what they were doing, as long as they quit bugging Nami so she would quit bugging him then everyone would be satisfied.

As he was about to knock on the door, it occurred to him that there was water leaking from underneath the space in the door. Strange, did they spill the water out of the tub? What were they doing splashing water about anyway? Did he really want to know? No. All he did know was that Franky and Nami weren't going to be too happy about that. He knocked a few times and waited. No reply. He could've sworn he heard someone walking towards the door, but that may have just been his imagination. He knocked again and waited. Still no reply.

Growing concerned, Usopp leaned against the door to hear inside. There was a sound. Someone yelped. "Sanji?" he called. The job was supposed to be an easy one. All Sanji had to do was take Zoro up to the bathhouse and be the lifeguard. Since Zoro had a fever he couldn't be left alone. "Zoro?" he knocked again.

There was a thumping sound and a crack of a tile. Franky definitely isn't going to be pleased. He heard Zoro's voice say something inaudible and then another voice, loud and clear.

"I'm not-!"

And then there was a splash that cut the cook off. The sounds of water slapping the tiles could be heard and strange banging noises. Maybe they were having one of their little escapades again. If they damaged anything, Nami would probably have them pay out their-

"USOPP!!!" a voice cried desperately.

The sudden shout made Usopp jump and briefly shook up his wits. He recognized the shout to be Sanji's voice.

"Sanji!?" he called as he knocked again.

He began to pound on the door then ramming it with his shoulder in an attempt to open it. Shit, he didn't have any of his tools on him! Whatever was happening inside, Sanji needed his help and Usopp needed to get in there fast. What on earth was Zoro doing??

The door suddenly burst open behind him.

"What's going on, Long-Nose-kun?" Robin asked worriedly.

"It's Sanji and Zoro!" Usopp exclaimed. "Something is not right!"

Robin crossed her arms and with a click the bathroom door came unlocked. The marksman swung the door open as quickly as he could and rushed inside without regards to what the consequences were.

He and Robin stopped short at the sight before them.

There, at the side of the tub, they could see Zoro with their back to him. No sight of Sanji. A drenched Zoro had both arms in the water like he was holding something down, he was trembling from the effort. No sight of Sanji. The water's surface was rippling wildly as the clear fluid flowed over the edges of the tub. No sight of Sanji. A feverish look was on Zoro's face, a look that could kill. Where was Sanji? A pale hand suddenly surfaced and clawed at Zoro's shoulder weakly, gripping on to the fabric and pulling. Sanji, where could you be? The hand went lax and slipped from Zoro's shoulder, coming to a rest on the tub's edge and lay still. Sanji, come out and say that isn't you.

As if some strenuous task had been complete, Zoro keeled over and passed out.

"Zoro!!!"

"Cook-san!!"

Usopp sped to the bathing tub and dragged the man out of the watery grave, water poured past his lifeless lips in a stream.

Robin couldn't believe what she had just seen. Zoro strangling Sanji. _Zoro_ strangling _Sanji_. Zoro s_trangling_ Sanji. No matter how many times she repeated it over in her head she still couldn't get over it.

Usopp hauled the man onto the tile floor. It was evident Sanji was not breathing. He checked for his heartbeat and pulse and found nothing.

"Shit." the marksman hissed. "Robin! Get Chopper for me, please!"  
"Right." The woman nodded. She dashed for the door.

Usopp immediately administered CPR and mouth to mouth resuscitation. He heard Robin calling Chopper in a panicky tone. That would definitely make the doctor rush if _Robin_ was in a state of panic. He was still doing CPR when he heard Chopper's voice yelling frantically.

"What's the matter?? Did something happen to Zoro!? Is he alright!?"

Zoro was probably the least of their problems right now.

"What happened!?" Chopper exclaimed.

"Doctor-san, we found Cook-san submerged in the tub-"  
"How the hell did that happen!?" the reindeer continued to panic. He set to examining the cook as Usopp continued his efforts of resuscitation.

Robin hesitated. "Swordsman-san did it."  
The reindeer faltered for a brief moment before continuing to check the cook's vitals. "I can't find a pulse and his heart is barely beating!"

The others were suddenly standing by the door, looking in with worried and concerned expressions.

"What's going on? What happened?" Nami asked. "Is Zoro hurt?"

Brooke gasped, "What happened to Sanji-san??"

"Zoro's going to be fine, it's Sanji who's in danger now."

Usopp began to push harder on Sanji's chest. Damn it, he still wasn't breathing!

"What happened?" Luffy asked, repeating the other two's questions.

"Usopp found him in the tub, unconscious and not breathing," Chopper said. "I don't know how long he could've been in there!"

Robin glanced at the reindeer for putting it so vaguely, but the others need not know about what really happened until things came under order again and their friend was out of danger.  
Usopp breathed into Sanji's mouth, Nami watched as the cook's chest rose but the man did not stir. Usopp continued to push then breathed air into his mouth once more. Sanji coughed weakly as water, enough to fill a glass, flowed from his mouth.

"I've got a pulse!" Chopper exclaimed. "It's faint. Keep going!"  
A minute passed and nothing more happened. Usopp continued to perform CPR till he was worn out but not ready to give up. Sanji's pulse was growing fainter and Chopper was beginning to panic. The others stood by helpless as they watched.

Almost two minutes went by when their determination finally paid off. Sanji's hand twitched ever so slightly before his whole back arched and a gallon of water spewed from his mouth. He coughed and choked and sputtered, gagging here and there, but all that mattered was that he was breathing. Given it was ragged and harsh but at least he was breathing. Whether or not he was conscious however remained unclear for his gaze was dull and unfocused.

"Usopp, help me lift his head real briefly," Chopper said. "Careful."  
The marksman slipped a hand underneath the cook's shoulders and the back of his head and gently lifted him up enough for the reindeer to see.

"He's bleeding badly," the reindeer observed. "He's suffering from head trauma."

"Do you think that's what caused him to fall unconscious in the tub?"  
Chopper, Usopp and Robin all glanced at each other.

"What?" Nami eyed them. "What is it?"

Brooke and Franky were beginning to grow suspicious as well now while Luffy remained oblivious.  
Chopper had Sanji placed in the infirmary and Zoro in the men's quarters.

Meanwhile, Usopp set on explaining what had happened to the best of his knowledge and Robin was there to back him up.

"No way!" Luffy was outraged. "There's no way Zoro would have done that! He wouldn't hurt a friend!"  
"Luffy, Zoro did have a high fever when we found them," Chopper explained. "He may have not been aware-"

"I still don't believe it!"

"Calm down, Luffy, please," Nami begged. "I don't see how it's possible either."  
"Look, I'm not lying about this, why would I?" Usopp asked. "I know what I saw, like it or not, that's what happened."

"Captain-san," Robin spoke. "You saw the scratches on Cook-san's neck and Swordsman-san's hands and arms."

Luffy nodded.

"Those are signs of a struggle. You can't deny the bruises on Cook-san's neck either."

"I know." Luffy sighed.

"Give it time," said Chopper. "We won't know the truth until one of them wakes up."

Zoro's fever began to recede and he was showing signs of getting better. Sanji, however, was only declining into the side effects of strangulation. His throat was swollen so bad he could hardly breathe. Chopper was afraid that he might swallow his tongue any second now.

Zoro awoke first. The very next morning.

Dazed and confused, the man was surprised to find himself lying in the men's quarters in his own bed. Strange, last he remembered he was in the infirmary courtesy of Chopper. Hm, maybe he had been diagnosed well enough to be back in his own hammock. Hell yeah.

He stretched, noticing that the others were sound asleep in their beds, save two people. The doctor and the cook were absent.

Well, Chopper probably had the watch and Sanji was probably already set on breakfast.

As he pushed himself out of bed he found the skin on his arms to be rather irritated. He looked down and was shocked to see long, angry red scratches covering his entire arms. There were a few spots where the skin had been broken but that was where band-aids had been placed. What in the world? Did he do this to himself when he was sick? He was definitely going to ask Chopper about this later, but first, breakfast. He felt like he could eat an entire cow and then horse or two.

Missing a few days felt odd, he really didn't know how long he had been out but it felt like a while now. It was kind of discomforting, he felt out of the loop.

Not bothering to change his clothes, Zoro headed to the galley of the Thousand Sunny. Maybe Sanji would be in a good mood and serve him an amazingly huge breakfast. Tch, yeah right. He was probably going to have to tie Luffy down so he could eat everything off his plate in peace.

Zoro entered the galley but was surprised to find that no one was in there. Did Sanji have watch instead? If so, where was Chopper? Was he in the infirmary?

He tread quietly for the sick bay door. The curtain was drawn so he could not see inside. Strange, the curtain was only ever down when Chopper had a patient. He decided to knock.

There was a small snort, Chopper, and a _thump_. Zoro could hear Chopper's little feet tapping against the wood. The door opened just a slight crack.

"Zoro!" Chopper opened the door further now, his eyes staring up at the swordsman in shock. "Y-You're awake!"

"What are you doing in here, Chopper?" Zoro blinked.

The reindeer seemed to fidget under his gaze as he avoided eye contact. Zoro stared at the reindeer in confusion until a sound reached his ears. The sound of harsh and ragged breathing that was coming from the bed.

Chopper saw an astonished gaze take over Zoro's features as he looked past the doctor.

"What the?" Zoro said in a quiet voice. "What's he doing in here?"  
Involuntarily, Zoro took a step forward. Chopper leaped back in surprise but then made to stop him. "Hold on there, Zoro!"  
He saw the cook lying in the bed.

"What happened??" Zoro's voice grew angry.

Chopper shuddered. "Wait a minute, you don't remember?"

Zoro blinked. "Remember what?"  
The doctor faltered. "Ah, well, it happened when you were sick so-"

He was interrupted by a bout of abrasive coughing from Sanji which aroused alarm in the little reindeer. Zoro got a good look at the large bruises that marred the cook's neck and tiny little abrasions that looked as if he were attacked with sandpaper. His eyes had red spots underneath them and his face was bruising as well.

"What the hell?" Zoro took a step forward as his hand reflexively went to his sword. "Who did this?"  
Chopper glanced to Zoro's sword. "Let it be, Zoro. It won't do any good to point fingers."

Something about the doctor's words forced Zoro to relax. He released his sword and examined the cook's neck.

"Those... Those bruises on his neck," Zoro started. "They're shaped like hands. Did someone try to strangle him?"  
The doctor's expression grew sorrowful. "Yes."  
The swordsman stood there for a little while longer before silently leaving the room.

* * *

I haven't written/planned a chapter 3 yet.

No one likes to review. No chapter 3 unless I get a few reviews. You don't even have to be nice, just tell me if I didn't include enough details or something. You can even tell me what you'd like to read in the next chapter. I'll type it.

It's a little droll and bland, I'll admit that.


	3. Everyone But Me

Since my reviewers are so nice. Hope you like it.

* * *

Usopp hid himself deep in the confines of the ship. Morning had been as odd as it could get without the usual breakfast, but when the marksman had spotted the first mate, he felt his heart speed up like never before. The first thing that had come to his mind had been a mix of two curse words put together.

_Shamn_.

Shamn? For a quick word fuck up that turned out pretty well. Shamn. Shit and damn put together. It could've come out as dit, which would have made less sense than shamn. Fubit* was another nice combination of words, but that was only created due to the fact that saying "fugly bitch" out loud was out of the question.

After escaping the sight of the swordsman, Usopp had locked himself below deck in his workshop. There were countless things needed to invent and he certainly didn't have the time to be answering Zoro's questions. Right, at least, that's what he would tell himself.

His hiding was largely due to the fact he didn't want to look Zoro in the eyes and tell him what he witnessed the other day. Zoro had only cried once in Usopp's presence and that had been a long time ago, right when they first recruited Sanji. Tears from the swordsman was like Luffy going on a vegetarian diet. It just did not seem possible or right. If Zoro cried, the whole world would be thrown out of balance. Or as it would seem to be from Usopp's point of view.

The marksman sighed as his screwdriver slipped from his grasp. Needless to say, Zoro would find out the truth sooner or later, either from the rest of the crew, Usopp himself, or from his own memory. That made the air on the Sunny feel like a ticking time bomb. Any second and Zoro could remember what happened. Just like that, and the world would turn. Luffy was between making Zoro face what he did and just biding his time until Zoro remembered it for himself. The only other person who had the right to tell Zoro was Sanji. Since Sanji wasn't in any condition to speak, the option of him telling the unknown truth was momentarily unavailable. So now most of the weight fell on him and Robin, the only two who witnessed the incident in its final stage.

Speaking of Sanji, how would the cook react? Would he blow up on the swordsman or just completely shut down? After all, he was the one who knew what really happened.

Ugh, it was like waiting for your birthday to come up. It's tomorrow, but everything seems to be dragging by so slowly. You just want it to come now. Yet at the same time, you don't want it to, for that means you're one step closer to becoming old and possibly senile.

This entire situation just sucked in general.

Footsteps from the hall jolted Usopp out of his musing, his heart skipped a beat. He could hear them clearly on the other side of the door, slowly coming down the stairs with heavy steps.

Shit on shingles, was Zoro coming to interrogate him now? It was bad enough that nature was beginning to call, but now he was soon to face what could possibly become his worst nightmare.

Death probably wouldn't bother to knock, rarely was that ever the case. He needed a place to hide!! What he wouldn't give to be a ninja master at moments like these, creeping along, stalking his prey. Shifting through the shadows and sneaking up upon some unsuspecting victim to snap his neck. Only in his wildest dreams.

Maybe Zoro wouldn't suspect that he, Usopp, would try to hide from him. Certainly not. The only source of cover was the pile of wooden boards. Ooh, he could possibly knock Zoro out and run while he still had the chance.

Usopp rushed for the wood pile, tripping over spare parts here and there. As he reached the mess of boards another thought made him stop. Then again, Zoro's head was as hard as a rock and would probably break the wood. It would be quite a shocker if the swordsman even felt the board hitting him. If he could survive Luffy and Sanji, then a flimsy piece of wood was no match for him. What about a crowbar? The most hits that would take would probably be two. A less violent approach would probably be the better option, such as tear gas or a smoke screen. That way, Chopper wouldn't scold him if he gave Zoro a concussion.

As he was thinking through his options, someone called his name.

"Usopp?"  
The board slipped between his fingers, but his shoulders relaxed as he recognized the voice. It was Nami.

"Something wrong, Nami?" Usopp couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief.

"Zoro's awake, you know." she said, almost expectantly.

"Yeah."

"And?"  
Usopp frowned and met her firm gaze. She was standing at the end of the steps, standing up straight and stiff. If this wasn't about something serious or touchy she would be leaning against the frame in a cool and relaxed manner, as if she were examining you. Her knees were locked and her feet were place evenly on the ground. Arms and hands were rigid by her sides, depicting her mood. If they were crossed she was either thinking/planning something or she was angry. If they were on her hips she was ether being witty, seductive or angry. Anger happened often. She can smiling lovingly at you and still be plotting your slow and painful death and what instruments of torture she would use. Nami wasn't down here to chat idly or joke. The woman was expecting something from him, something he would more than likely be unwilling to give. "And what?"

Nami shifted, adjusting her shirt almost uncomfortably. "Aren't you going to tell him?"  
Something fluttered in Usopp's chest as he realized what she wanted _him_ to do.

"Well, you know what happened too," the corner of his lip twitched slightly. "Why don't you tell him? Or anyone else for that matter?"  
"You saw what happened in there."

"So did Robin," the marksman whined. "And she's not afraid of Zoro. Why can't she do it?"  
Nami opened her mouth to criticize Usopp about being afraid of the swordsman, but at the moment it was irrelevant, and she was tired of Luffy sulking and Zoro giving everyone that "look" when they avoided his questions. "Robin doesn't want to because she believes she isn't the one to tell him."  
"I'm not the one to tell him either!" Usopp got defensive. "It should be Sanji or Luffy, since Luffy's the captain."  
"Luffy won't do it. Chopper asked him not to."  
"Why Chopper?"

Nami folded her arms. Aw crap.

"Chopper said there were quite a few unanswered questions, too many for us to tell Zoro what happened and what he tried to do." the navigator gritted her teeth. "He said it's either best to wait until Zoro remembers himself or until Sanji gets well enough to speak."

Usopp contemplated how long that might take. A week maybe? A week at the _most_. That might actually be pushing it, but it was the only reasonable time frame he could think of. They would be lucky if it was resolved today. Yet once again, this would all depend on how _Sanji_ would react.

"I'm not going to be the one to tell him," Usopp closed his eyes. "Even though I saw what happened, I don't know everything. I don't have the answer, I'd just be giving him more questions to ask."  
Nami relaxed and her shoulders drooped.

"If I told him what I know right now, how do you think he'd feel if he knew he hurt Sanji but couldn't remember when or why?"

The navigator knew she was defeated when she told Usopp what Chopper had said, but she wasn't ready to accept things may not go back to normal. She wanted to know that everything would be alright then and now. Patience was not one of her strong points, despite having Luffy as her Captain.

Chopper was devouring his books like they were candy. No, he wasn't eating them literally. He was scavenging the pages for knowledge on concussions and other sorts of head injuries. He knew this stuff already but he wanted to reread it just to be sure. Sanji's head injury surely wouldn't be that bad, but there was no telling how it would go when he woke up. Minor confusion? Major disorientation? Complete amnesia? When the devil would he find out??

The doctor sighed. "Brooke, as nice as it is to have you in here watching Sanji, I think I can handle it."  
The skeleton shifted his ever watchful gaze from the blond's still form and looked at Chopper. "Huh? You sure?"  
Chopper frowned slightly, meeting Brooke's nonexistent eyes. It was hard to tell the emotion the musician was portraying. Was he hurt by the doctor's words or was he just apathetic?

"I'm sure, besides, you probably have better things to do then sit in here all day, it's pretty boring."

"Ah, it's not a problem," the skeleton rose to leave anyway. "Watching out for a friend is never a problem. I just wish that Sanji-san would wake soon and cook one of his delicious meals like he usually does and maybe make one of his fabulous deserts."

The reindeer began to picture what sort of sweet concoction the cook would come up with. It made him drool with delight.  
Chopper glanced to the cook. "I bet he'd be blushing at your compliment right now, Brooke, if he was awake. If not the blush I'm certain he would be deeply grateful that you love his food so."  
A blushing Sanji made Brooke chuckle for some odd reason. "Blushing? It doesn't suit him, but it's quite an amusing thought. Oh, just listen to me, making fun of him when he's lying here, bedridden. He'd have my head."  
"He'd have your head out of love." Chopper giggled. "Tell you what, Brooke, if you want to wait here so badly, you could come back when night falls."  
"Ah, and you would be able to get some shut eye." Brooke clapped his bony hands together. "What a perfect idea! I'll be back then!"

Brooke left, shutting door softly behind him and headed for the Aquarium Bar.

The deck of the Sunny seemed empty, except for Luffy who sat in the swing. It was a given that he was thinking about something that weighed heavily on his mind since he wasn't swinging and jumping off to see how far he could fly.

"Luffy-san, what's got you down?"  
Luffy pouted. "It's Zoro."  
"Oh?"

"He won't talk to anyone until one of us tells him what happened."

As down as the captain seemed to be, that surely wasn't the only thing on his mind. If that had been the only reason, he would've had the biggest sad face Brooke had ever seen, but Luffy only bore a small frown upon his face and his gaze was unfocused on the space before him instead of downcast like a pout.

"You're debating whether or not you should tell him?"  
Luffy hesitated. "Yeah."  
Brooke looked to the blue sky above him. "It is your decision to make, Luffy-san. You are the captain, you do as you wish."  
"But I don't want to tell Zoro what Usopp told me." Luffy pouted. "Because if what Usopp told me was true and Zoro did do it on purpose, then that means Zoro tried to kill Sanji. If that's what happened then..." the boy broke off, his frown grew even more deep. "Then that would mean I would have to make Zoro leave the crew. I can't forgive someone that tries to hurt my friends, and if Zoro did it on purpose..." Luffy's jaw clamped shut, as if he feared to go on. He looked up to Brooke and was surprised to find the musician staring at him intently. Hard to say since he had no eyes, but Luffy had that feeling.

"Do you believe Zoro-san did it on purpose?"

"Not for all the meat in the world."

Brooke chuckled softly. "Then there's your answer. The best you can do for both Zoro-san and Sanji-san is wait. Sanji-san will soon wake and sort it out for us."  
"Chopper said there's a chance he might not remember." Luffy interjected.

"Zoro-san could still remember. Though, admittedly, Zoro-san may have the better chance of recalling what happened, Sanji-san will probably gain his memory back in due time." Brooke placed a hand on Luffy's shoulder. "If Zoro didn't really do it, then I'm sure things will go back to normal in no time."  
Luffy blinked as a small, minute smile cracked. "You think so?"  
"I sure do."

Franky glanced to the raven-haired woman as she read her book quietly, normally it wouldn't be as silent as it was now, but they were lacking a cook to offer them a drink.

"Robin, if you don't mind me asking," Franky scratched his neck. "What exactly did you and Usopp see?"

The woman didn't respond at first. She calmly shut her book and placed it neatly in her lap. Her gaze traveled upwards and became unfocused.

"I saw water flooding the tub and spreading out all over the floor. Swordsman-san had his back to us, he didn't even see us come in." she said in a dull voice. "Cook-san was submerged in the water, all I could see was his hand, gripping Swordsman-san's sleeve before going limp."

She sure knew how to put it into morbid detail, but it wasn't like she was exaggerating or anything. It must be a little difficult to put it in to words, seeing something like that.

"Swordsman-san passed out before we could even react." she closed her eyes. "It's something I never want to witness again. It's hard to see one friend hurting another."

"You don't suppose he did it on purpose, do you?"

Robin thought carefully before answering. "No. I do not think Swordsman-san would purposely harm Cook-san." she looked to Franky. "Do you?"  
Franky scoffed. "Of course not." he waved a hand. "It's just, what do you think could've happened in there that resulted in this?"

The woman shook her head. "I don't know."  
It was then that the Aquarium Bar door opened. For a moment, Franky almost didn't believe his eyes when he saw the well dressed figure with a lanky frame, but he realized that it was their other gentlemanly crew member that was approaching them.

"Morning, Brooke," Franky waved. "How's it going? Anything new??"

"No," the skeleton sighed. "Sanji-san hasn't even stirred. Chopper said it's probably a concussion."  
"How bad?"  
"He won't really know until Sanji-san wakes up."

"And what about Zoro?"  
"Hm?" Brooke shook his head. "I haven't seen him since this morning."

By lunch, Zoro was cursing himself into a hole. The day wasn't even over yet and he was going insane with the total lack of communication. Hell, even the mystery of what happened to the cook was driving him insane. Yesterday seemed like such a blur to him. Had there been some sort of Marine attack while he was sick? It must've not been life threatening for he may have slept through it like a baby. But if it hadn't been life threatening then why was the cook in the condition he was in now? What was this cold feeling he was getting from the others so suddenly?

His anger only made him pump weights furiously. Chopper probably wouldn't approve of him straining himself like this while recovering from his sicknesses, but it had only been minor, and Zoro had a ridiculous amount of steam to blow off.

He felt the need to be in the infirmary by Sanji's side, but every time he tried to go there, the memory of the face Chopper gave him earlier that morning stopped him. The looks the others had and their unanimous question "You don't remember?" were all too convenient. It felt kind of like that Kuma incident. There was a touchy subject that was danced about and not mentioned to more than half the crew. Then, Sanji knew about that, he knew what Zoro had done for their captain, while Luffy remained clueless. Now, _everyone_ else knew what had happened to Sanji, but Zoro did not. It wasn't like they were trying to keep him from knowing whatever it was. They just wouldn't tell him themselves. The only thing that didn't make sense to Zoro was why were they so reluctant to talk about it? Sanji got injured, sure, it happened all the time. But every time Zoro asked "Who did it?" they would all avert his gaze and give him the same answer, "Now is not the time to talk about it."

The truth of the matter was that Zoro was kind of, maybe, sort of... afraid. He was afraid to push them to talk. It frayed his nerves that he couldn't remember, but at the same time he felt safe being ignorant. But if someone had brought the cook pain, then he didn't want to be ignorant. Like it or not, that's how Zoro truly felt, and it tore at him to no end. Zoro was so furious he felt like chucking the entire set of weights through the window, but then he would have to deal with Franky. That was the last thing he needed right now.

As he fantasized throwing every single object in the room out every damn window, his eyes traveled down to his arms. The red marks, which had now decreased in size, caught his eye. He still couldn't remember where he had gotten them, and he wasn't even entirely sure if he had done the scratching himself.

A ghostly hand suddenly gripped his wrist, as a slick, wet feeling came from it. It chilled his skin as he attempted to break free, but found that his body would not respond. The grip tightened as he felt a burning sensation coming from the abrasions in waves, like someone was digging their nails into his skin right then and there. His face felt cold as though someone had splashed water on it. His fingers curled...

Zoro snapped out of his reverie with a jolt. The weight he had been previously holding was now held loosely in the hand he had been staring at.

With a shake of his head as he placed the weight back in its respectful place. Maybe he should stop working out for the day.

* * *

If you find any mistakes, please let me know. And don't forget to review! Anything specific you want to see in the next chapter?

*Fubit= Fugly Bitch. If you've ever played Poke'mon Diamond or Pearl, then you surely must know what a Bidoof is. It's the retarded beaver Poke'mon. We attempted to name it "Fugly Bitch" but since there wasn't enough space, I gave the suggestion of "fubit". Thus was this horrendous word born. And yes, I have said "shamn" before.


	4. The REASON

For the record, I _have_ said balls on French toast, in fact, I said it just before I started typing it. Why? I was angry with my Zune program.

Chapter Four, yo.

* * *

"Oh, balls on French toast." Usopp growled. "That's the fifth time this week I've lost my slingshot. Where the hell could it be?"

"Speaking of French toast." Franky drooled. "That sounds amazing right now."

"It's way past breakfast, Franky."

"A man can have breakfast any time of the day he wants."

"Then it would be brunch or... brinner?" Usopp shrugged then folded his arms. "If you're having breakfast at dinner time then there's something wrong with you*."

"Having waffles for dinner is the best thing ever! Didn't you ever try it before?"

Usopp's brow furrowed. "What's the difference?"  
"They taste better!"  
"What? How the hell does eating waffles at dinner make them taste better than they do in the morning?"

"Because, it's like breaking the universal and unwritten rule that waffles are to be eaten at breakfast. When eating waffles for dinner evil has never tasted so good!"

The marksman stared blankly at the carpenter.

"Come to the dark side, Usopp!" Franky laughed with a cracked grin.

Zoro had now taken to meditating, still unwilling to leave the uh, observation room? Crow's nest/gym, who the fuck cared anymore? At least there was no one was here to bother him or give him _that look_. A look like he was secretly being pitied and feared from afar. Never mind them. Meditating. Meditating was good for the soul. Think soothing thoughts. Soothing, relaxing thoughts. That ought to to ease his mind. Yeah.

As Zoro settled into the quiet confines of his mind, he began to suddenly feel a surge of adrenaline. He could hear the sound of water, not the ocean waves, but water slapping a hard surface and splashing. He opened his eyes.

Not one drop of liquid in sight.

Nettled, he attempted to resume his meditating, but found his mind far too muddled to relax. Frustrated, he threw himself on the couch. He checked to make sure his katana was with him. Just to make sure.

He would never forget that time he nearly lost them to that freak way back when he first met Luffy. What was his name? It danced on the tip of his tongue.

If it hadn't been for Luffy, Zoro probably wouldn't be here today. He probably would've lost his life and broke the promise he made to Kuina. It would've been the fault of that one jerk. What was his name again?  
The swordsman could recall Luffy's surprise when they met Koby on Water 7. The kid looked so strikingly different. He had matured a lot since they had last seen him. Then there was the one weirdo that stood next to him and fought with a strange set of blades that had been no match for Zoro. Tall, blond, a real airhead with a massive ego that was only backed by his dad's power. Until Luffy crumbled it.

His name. What was his name?

Out on the deck below him, he spotted Luffy, swaying lifelessly on the swing. He had a look on his face that Zoro seldom ever saw him express. Luffy was lost.

Luffy never got "lost". Luffy always knew where to go and where he had or needed to be. He sometimes strayed from the path, but it was like his own little shortcut. Only longer. Luffy logic, one of the world's greatest mysteries.

But the Luffy he saw before him was not one he was used to seeing. To add to the drama, the captain was also ex-animate. Luffy was never idle, only when he was asleep was he ever this peaceful. This just didn't make much sense at all.

As if the boy could sense his gaze, he looked up and met Zoro's eyes. Seeing that he wouldn't break eye contact any time soon, Zoro looked away, feeling slightly uneasy in the line of Luffy's vision.

He had that look on his face like he had been caught sneaking food back when they had the Merry. At times, Luffy would end up depleting their rations by half by himself and the cook would go through all odds and ends to force him to fess up. Luffy would give him that face as if he didn't know what he was talking about, but when the captain did slip, he would have that "Oh shit, I'm totally screwed." look on his face in an instant. Rightfully so, for the cook would swab the deck with his ass.

Zoro's stomach growled, which not so subtly hinted that it wanted food, now. First breakfast had gone unserved, now lunch was slowly ticking away and there was no sign of food being prepared.

The lack of food preparation was also becoming an increasing problem for Zoro. Food was Sanji's job, but since he couldn't do the job at the moment, that left the rest of them to fend for themselves. With no cook, there was no food, with no food, Zoro was left to think on why there was no food. Thinking about why there was no food made him think about Sanji. The REASON.

The REASON was something Zoro wanted to avoid for the moment, an advantage of no longer having the Merry. The Sunny was much more roomy and gave him plenty of space to separate himself from awkward moments. On the Merry, the only place you could really go for isolation was either the men's quarters or the Aquarium Bar. _Sometimes_.

Zoro looked down to his hands. _Had _it been a dream? It all seemed so vivid yet so distant all at once. He could see himself wringing that bastard's neck but it didn't feel like it was his own body doing it. Maybe he had clawed himself in his sleep? Chopper would know, but Chopper was with the REASON. The source of Zoro's misery at the moment.

He could probably isolate himself in here all day and sleep, but even he was limited to the number of hours his body would allow him to be unconscious. Besides, what fun would that be? Not that he lived off fun, he just wanted some... diversity? _That_ was a luxury on any typical ship, but then again, being part of the Straw Hat crew meant things were usually not boring. Unless everyone was being so damned depressed.

The sound of water splashing came to his ears again.

It was the sound from his dream, when he beating the crap out of someone for taking his swords. Had it taken place in the bathroom? Why in the bathroom?

Zoro took a deep breath.

Yesterday hadn't been out of the ordinary. He was confined to bed, slept most of the time and ate and took his medicine when told to. So basically he had been treated like a baby, which he utterly despised. Lunch had passed and his clothes had started to feel rather unpleasant and sticky from all the sweat. Chopper hadn't deemed him healthy enough to clothe himself so he ordered someone else to do it. Someone who could lug the swordsman's weight around. That ruled out the girls, Usopp and Brooke. Luffy wasn't the ideal nanny nor was Franky. That left either Chopper or Sanji and since Chopper was the one giving out orders then, it must've been Sanji. That's right. After Sanji helped/dragged him out of bed everything else was a blur.

Zoro caught Luffy staring up at him from below. The boy had that same pathetic look on his face. It was a look that Zoro could not quite read. Luffy looked sorry about **something**, but what and why? Why wasn't he running around playing with Usopp and Chopper like he usually did? Why wasn't he sitting on the Sunny's head and looking out to the horizon? And why won't he stop staring with _that look_?

"Oh, nartkin bulloffer hopper..." Chopper muttered under his breath as he flipped through a book, exasperated.

"Uh, come again?" Usopp asked.

The doctor looked up at the marksman. "What?"  
"Never mind," the marksman waved a hand. "Anything new?"  
"No, other than Luffy kind of sulking, which I didn't think was possible." Chopper mused. "Zoro hasn't really shown himself much, I think he locked himself up in the crow's nest."

"Hm, I wonder if he remembers anything." the man sighed as he laced his fingers behind his head. "It's really unnerving, waiting for the truth."

"What if..." Chopper started. "What if we don't want to know the truth, is that a bad thing?"

To ask a liar that question was quite the moral conflict there. Truth was, Usopp feared the truth as well. He hadn't thought of it before, but he was quite nervous to find out what really happened. What if the swordsman actually had tried to maim their cook? No. Zoro would never do that, right? Of course not. Still, the thought of it being possible was frightening, but he couldn't betray Zoro's friendship and suspect that he would do such a thing. No.

"It isn't a bad thing, Chopper." Usopp said in a serious tone. "But sometimes, if you just go on without knowing the truth you'll regret it for the rest of your life."  
That summed it up in a nutshell, yes it did. Truth was meant to be known.

The reindeer gazed up at the marksman in awe.

"You're so truthful and inspirational, Usopp!" Chopper beamed.

Truthful? Usopp was not often such a thing. Inspirational? Yes, Usopp was an inspiring man in more ways than one. Captain Usopp, never missing a chance to bask in the admiration of his fans since the day he was born.

"Well, I gotta get back to the workshop, those gadgets don't invent themselves."

Chopper rocked in his chair with mirth, "Glad you found your slingshot, Usopp. I'll let you know if anything changes, alright?"  
"Later."

The doctor set to organizing the various herbs and mixtures he had. They had become so disarranged over the past few days. Hmph, his first aid supplies could use a little restocking as well. A doctor needed to always be ready. Ready for anything. Ready for action and adventure. He needed to be ready like Usopp, always taking on whatever enemy no matter what size. Yeah. He could be like Usopp.

"Hiyah!" Chopper slashed the air with a tongue depressor. "Have at thee, villain! I dare you to challenge me! Hahahaha!"

He got low to the ground. "Oh no, it's the hero, Doctor Chopper!" he said in his lowest and roughest voice. "Us bad guys don't stand a chance against him!"

The little reindeer leaped up on his swivel chair. "That's right! You are no match for me!" He pointed in the air with the wooden stick. "For I am the Great Doctor Tony Tony-"  
Something out of the corner of his eye caught his attention.

Sanji was propped up on his elbows and squinting in the dim light. He was staring at Chopper with an amused expression.

* * *

* as I typed this, I came to realize that I have ordered breakfast at dinner time on at least three different occasions at Denny's.

HELMEPPO. I just discovered today that's actually how it's spelled.


	5. Tell them, but don't TELL them

_Where am I? Who is that person that was supporting me just moments ago? Do I even know him?_

_"What the _hell _was that for-?"_

_"What are you doing here?"_

Zoro's fist throbbed as he remembered the impact it had made from the other man's jaw.

_"What do you mean 'what am I doing here?'? I was told to, no, _ordered _to help you clean yourself, you jackass."_

Everything was distorted. Colors merged into one another and shapes shifted from straight-edged to rounded. Someone was standing before him. A familiar stranger with no face.

_"Lies!"_

Zoro blinked. He wasn't as dumb as most would give him credit for, all it took was a little hard thinking and he could figure out that two plus two equals four. Still, it was hard to determine a dream from reality when everything of the past two days was a blur, but given the current circumstances, he had the feeling that what he was remembering was anything but a dream.

_"Whatever, just get in so we can get this over with."_

He closed his eyes.

_His waist came into view as he seemed to be searching his haramaki._

_"What?" came a taunting voice. "Miss your toys? Don't tell me you need your swords to take a bath-"_

_"Where have taken my swords, -?"_

The swordsman's eyes snapped open, suddenly remembering the strange reaction he had gotten from the other. That half confused and half disgusted look. He could not quite grasp the exact look of the other man's face.

_"Oi," The familiar voice said, it dripped with venom. "What did you just call me?"_

_"Where have you put my swords, bastard?"_

Zoro felt himself swing involuntarily, narrowly avoiding the window-

_The familiar ducked._

Anger boiled inside of Zoro, unexplained rage and hatred for the other.

_"Look, I don't have your swords, -."_ The voice wavered. _"They're down in the men's quarters where you left them. Okay?"_

_"You lie."_

_A strange expression came across the other's face. "Why would I lie?"_

_"Because you always lie, -!"_

It was on the tip of his tongue. He knew it! It was somewhere inside his head. He just had to think harder. It was so maddening. It's there, he could feel it, but he just couldn't reach it.

_He could see someone standing before him, but his mind just did not comprehend who it was and why he seemed so familiar. His face, his face was there, but it was distorted in Zoro's mind. He had a curious look upon his face like someone had dropped an ice cube down his shirt._

Zoro remembered stepping forward with a swing, in an attempt to knock that silly expression off his face and possibly send him to oblivion.

_Helmeppo side-stepped him and then there was water._

A voice, muffled by the water. _"Now you just take your bath like a good little boy so this can be done as soon as possible." The other turned his back. "And so I don't have to deal with you anymore."_

_Water dripped on the floor. A soft, fabric was clutched between his calloused fingers as he tugged on it. Someone hit the floor, muttering angrily, but Zoro didn't hear what they were saying as his fist connected solidly with his jaw. Smooth, blond strands replaced the cloth now. He pulled back and slammed the head down on the tile. A thin hand wrapped tightly around his wrist as his grip tightened._

_"If you won't tell me, then I'll make you tell me!"_

_"Look, I'm not-"_

_After those first few words Zoro only felt his adrenaline accelerate, he only saw red as he pulled the tousled blond's head up once more._ _The other man started to speak, but Zoro didn't listen as he pushed him back into the tile._

_"Tell me!"_

_Over and over again, unable to stop himself. He watched as his body, that did not feel like his own, pound the blond's head in._

Stop.

_A blow to the side winded him. He rolled off but was back on his feet in an instant. He spotted the blond trying to crawl away, a smirk tugged at his lips as he moved in front of him._

_"Thought you could get away, -?"_

No, wait-

_The golden strands were entwined with his fingers once more as he brought a face to his eye level._

Zoro's mind told him that this was an enemy but his eyes said otherwise. His senses conflicted with each other.

_The touch of his hair felt... oddly familiar and betrayed the look of its softness._

The fingers of his other hand curled into a tight fist-

_His knuckles slammed into the offender's stomach, knocking him into a wall._

_Water began to pool around Zoro's feet now. He could hear the tap still running, the tub was overflowing._

_"I wasn't going to kill you, since you know where my swords are."_

Zoro's expression changed to horro as he watched his fingers wrap around his throat. He felt the windpipe strain against his grasp.

_"But since you're refusing to tell me, I may as well just get rid of you now. You're in the way."_

The scared look increased. The figure grew more solid in his mind, but his eyes were still trying to tell him otherwise. His eyes made his mind uneasy.

_Both hands wrapped around the other man's throat. Well trimmed nails scratched the skin on his arms. Then everything was a struggle and a blur._

No, wait-

_Zoro felt himself lose his footing on the wet floor and they both tumbled to the floor. He saw a black suited body fall next to him. Next thing he knew, they were trying to get away from him, towards the door. He grabbed the long leg closest to him and pulled him back._

_"-?"_

_He grabbed the throat once more and turned towards the bathtub._

_"Say goodbye,-."_

Wait.

_The other began to say something, but was once more cut off as Zoro plunged him into the water. The swordsman held him there as they kicked and thrashed, splashing water all over the place. They continued to claw Zoro's hands and arms then began to claw at their own throat. They were fighting hard, rivaling Zoro's strength._

That's not right-

_"USOPP!"_

_He grappled the man with his other hand and forced him back underwater._

That strength. It was familiar. Only Luffy was possibly more stronger than Zoro, but Luffy had dark hair. There was only one other person that could be on the ship who had blond hair, who wasn't an enemy, and knew their long-nosed sharpshooter.

Zoro's vision swam in and out of focus, he felt his heart race. It was becoming clear to him now and he dreaded every second of it.

A face was looking up at him through the rippling water, desperately. A hand grasped his sleeve briefly as Zoro stared into the visible blue eye.

Sanji.

Chopper slipped out of the chair in his haste as the tongue depressor fell to the floor with a clatter. Sanji leaned over the bed to see if the little doctor was alright.

"That didn't happen." the reindeer leaped to his feet and straightened his hat. Swift as lighting to cover up his embarrassment- "Sanji, h-how are you?"

Maybe it wasn't the best way to approach the manner, fumbling with words and thoughts after his embarrassing display, but it was all he could think of to ask the cook.

Sanji rested back against the pillow, panting slightly. Holding himself up proved to be a tiring effort. To answer Chopper's question he gave the reindeer a thumbs up.

"That's shocking." The doctor brought over a nearby stool. "Or you're lying."

Sanji smirked.

He climbed on top it. "Can you speak?"

The blond took a brief moment to think and then gave a small shake of his head.

"Don't try to then, it's best that you don't overexert your larynx. There may even be further damage that has not presented itself yet. Can you swallow?"

Sanji made an effort, trying three times and succeeding on the fourth. He was rewarded with a throbbing pain in his throat.

"Don't try too hard if you can't." Chopper placed both hooves on either side of the cook's neck and gently applied pressure. "Does that hurt?"  
Judging by his wince, it did.

"Does your head hurt?"

Sanji waved his hand in a "so-so" motion.

"Nauseous? Dizzy?"

A reluctant nod.

As the doctor continued his examination, he was carefully trying to word how he would ask Sanji about what happened that day. All the while, Sanji was watching him closely with a penetrating stare that unnerved Chopper and made him a little clumsy. He was sure there were questions that Sanji wanted to ask and Chopper wasn't sure what to expect.

When the little reindeer finished the examination, he was surprised to find that the cook was no longer gazing at him, but to the opposite wall instead. The man's eyes were distant and unfocused, he didn't seem to notice Chopper staring at him.

"Sanji."  
The cook looked at him, his visible eye was dull and still clouded with blood.

Chopper took a deep breath. "Do you know why you're here?" He had to congratulate himself, he could not have said it anymore confidently.  
Sanji hesitated. Looking away from Chopper, he slowly brought a trembling hand up to his throat and tentatively touched the bruises, wincing slightly. His gaze fell on Chopper again as he shrugged.

Chopper nodded once. "I see." Sanji lowered his hands as Chopper continued. "Do you remember what happened?"  
Blue eyes fell downcast to the covers before closing them tightly. Chopper waited patiently for a few moments before Sanji opened his eyes again and shook his head.

"Alright." Chopper smiled softly. "I'll go get the others."  
The doctor slid out of the chair and tried not to skip too eagerly for the door. Once he was inside the galley he bolted for the deck.

"Sanji's awake!" he yelled in a sing song voice.

The initial response was a mixture between confused and surprised then shock and happiness.

"Really?" Franky popped out of the Aquarium Bar room. "That's super! I'm so happy!"

"Meat!" Luffy exclaimed and dashed for the infirmary.

"Wait! I don't think he can see that well, Luffy!" Chopper shouted. "You better not scare him or I'll stick you good!"

"Doctor-san." Robin approached.

"Yes, Robin?" the young reindeer blinked. "What is it?"

"What's his condition?" she asked.

Nami and Usopp stayed to listen as well.

"Well, his throat is still swollen. He has numerous blind spots due to the blood in his eyes." The doctor said. "He can't speak and I don't expect he'll be able to until... another two to four days maybe."

"He can't talk?" Usopp echoed.

"Did you ask him if he recalled anything?"

"Yeah." Chopper shook his head. "He doesn't remember what happened at all."  
Brooke appeared calmly from the men's quarters. "I hear Sanji-san is awake."  
"Where were you?" Usopp asked.

"Ah, I was taking a nap." The skeleton made his way to the galley.

"Wait, but you don't sl-"

"Speaking of naps." Franky looked up to the crow's nest. "What are we going to tell that guy?"

"Neither of them remembered what happened." Nami said. "But we have an idea."

"We shouldn't say anything that might upset Cook-san or Swordsman-san." said Robin. "But maybe we should at least try to get Cook-san to remember what occurred in the bathroom."

"I agree." Nami nodded. "We can tell Zoro after we've questioned Sanji."

"I suppose it's for the best." Usopp said. "I kind of don't really want to know what happened but... I don't want to be able to suspect that Zoro did it on purpose."

"Alright." Chopper sighed. "But don't press him too hard for answers!"

As Usopp entered the infirmary he found Sanji glaring dangerously at Luffy who seemed to be playing charades with the cook.

"Ok, it's one word!" Luffy grinned.

Sanji glowered and punched the boy's in his face

"Right!" Luffy laughed through a bloody nose. "It was meat!"

The cook ruffled his hair in exasperation and he made a motion with his hands like he was going to wring the boy's neck.

"Good evening, Cook-san." Robin greeted with a chuckle.

Sanji's whole world seemed to brighten as he spotted Nami and Robin standing at the door.

"Waaah! We were so worried about you!" Franky cried into his arm. Sanji, as usual, didn't look too bothered.

"Sanji, you don't mind if we ask you a few questions, do you?" asked Nami.

The cook shook his head.

"I wouldn't count on him being able to write just yet." Chopper informed them. "Side effects of strangulation are weakness of the arms and legs."

Sanji didn't seem to like that fact as his face paled visibly in the dim light.

"Don't worry, Sanji!" Chopper said confidently. "You'll recover your strength, it'll just take time."

Sanji still seemed uncomfortable but didn't pester the doctor about it as he turned back to Nami.

"What's the last thing you remember?" She asked.

With much difficulty, he raised a hand and pointed to the galley room.

"Being in the kitchen?"

A nod.

"Preparing lunch?"  
Sanji gave them a curious look before nodding with slight dubiety.

"Anything after that?"  
For a moment he was thoughtful before shaking his head with defeat.

"Anything?"

Brooke could see the slight unease and confusion in the cook's face at the sudden probing questions.

"Hey, Sanji!" Luffy popped in front of the cook. "Who am I now?"

Luffy pushed his bangs up and stared at Sanji with a serious look. Sanji was about to punt him in his face when his eyes met Luffy's sudden solemn ones. The cook froze and stared as that distant look flooded back into eyes. Robin frowned tenuously as Sanji shrank away from Luffy's impression. Luffy suddenly pretended to fall asleep, snoring loudly. This time, Nami punched Luffy in the head as the blond snapped from his trance and looked around inquisitively. Unable to find what he was looking for he reached down and hoisted up their abused captain, bringing him eye level with himself.

"Heehee! You got it right again, Sanji!" Luffy laughed. "It's Zoro! Please don't kill me."  
Sanji didn't relinquish his hold on the boy's vest as he glared into the captain's eyes unrelentingly. Luffy stopped struggling and met the blond's gaze with an innocent look, staring at him for a brief moment.

"Oh? He's in the crow's nest." Luffy blinked.

The others froze, slightly astounded that Luffy could gather that Sanji was asking him something just by looking into his eyes. Sanji seemed slightly surprised as well.

"How the hell did you know that?" Franky asked.

"Maybe he can secretly read minds." Usopp whispered to an awe-struck reindeer.

"Really?" Chopper gasped. "Cool! You're amazing Luffy!"

Sanji jerked the red vest.

"Um, why?" the boy rubbed the back of his head. "Because no one will tell him what-"  
"NO!" Everyone, save Robin, shrieked as Usopp and Nami leaped forward to clamp their hands over Luffy's big mouth. The captain was torn from the cook's grip and almost sent him tumbling out of bed head first, but Franky saved him just in time.

Baffled, Sanji attempted to glare at them, but the sudden movement of his neck and head left him momentarily unable to move. Franky lowered him back against the pillows.

"Everyone, meeting, now." Nami said as she pointed to the door towards the back of the ship. "Sanji, you have to stay here."

As the others filed out, Chopper brought out a neck brace.

"I have no choice but to make you wear this, Sanji." The reindeer sighed. Sanji eyed the contraption with disdain but didn't object violently as Chopper installed the restraint. "It's for your own good and it will help you heal faster by keeping you from constantly moving it."

Overall, Sanji looked like he was pouting, but he didn't fight it.

"Hey, at least you don't have to wear a cone." Chopper informed him.

The cook seemed bemused for a moment before bursting into a bout of wheezy, almost silent, laughter. He came quite close to choking himself.

"No laughing!" Chopper scolded.

"Alright, let's settle this." Nami sighed. "Luffy, now is definitely not the best time to mention Zoro around Sanji."

"Huh? Why?"

"Captain-san, did you see how Cook-san reacted when you did your impression of Swordsman-san?"

"Um, yeah." Luffy poked his nose. "But I thought it was because I had a snot bubble coming out or something."

"I think it was a subconscious reaction." said Robin.

"Subconscious?" Franky blinked. "Then he does remember what happened?"

"It's there." Robin nodded. "Somewhere in the back of his mind, he remembers, but judging by the reaction itself..." The woman hesitated.

"You mean...?" Usopp hesitated. "Something really serious must have happened."

"His subconscious must be confused about what happened as well." Robin continued. "But the only way his subconscious will know is if his conscious mind remembers."

"So, Sanji will definitely remember?"

"Seeing that he doesn't have severe or permanent amnesia, he will in due time. I think," Robin said in all seriousness. "We should still try to jog Cook-san's memory as much as we can."

"I agree with you, Robin-san." Brooke said. "But I also think we should subtly tell Sanji-san what happened before the accident occurred."

"Tell him what?"

"His task to take Zoro-san to the bathroom." The musician replied simply. "He may remember what happened if we tell him outright what we know. At least part of it."

The others were quiet for a moment, silence weighed heavily upon them.

"It won't be easy for him, drowning is a terrible and truamatic experience, and he may confuse it with a dream." The raven-haired woman spoke. "We can not tell him what we saw in the end for it may mislead him."

"We can't exclude Zoro from this either. I think one of us should talk to him."

"I will"

Everyone's gaze turned to the captain.

"I'll do it."

Nami wanted to say something, she was afraid that Luffy might blow it, but at the same time, she felt that he was the best person to tell Zoro. Besides, the confident look on the boy's face told her that he would handle it in a way that none of the others would be able to manage. He would get the job done right. In the end, their captain always prevailed.

"Alright, Luffy will talk to Zoro and everyone else will talk to Sanji. We, of course, can't crowd him though, he'll suspect."

"I think it's too late for that, Navigator-san."

"Hm?"

"Cook-san already suspects something. We have to be careful with what we say."

"Right, to close this discussion- Luffy, wait a minute!" Nami grabbed the captain by his vest. "Are we all in agreement here that Zoro is not guilty until proven otherwise?"

There was a unanimous "Yes" from the group.

Suddenly apprehensive with himself, Zoro sunk low in his seat. In the subdued light it would've been hard to see him anyway from the deck, but the comfort of having a grip on the cushion was a pleasant one. If he let go he would lose track of all reality and fall back into a dream. There was no way he could lose his grip now, he had to get a hold of himself.

He didn't like this creeping feeling of angst. How the cook managed to brood as much as he did and live Zoro would never understand. This oppressive feeling was unwelcome in his mind and chest. Nobody was even in the room with him and he felt like he was being watched by disappointed eyes.

He sunk even lower until his rear wasn't even on the seat anymore, just his back now. If he could meld with the floor he would.

Frantic with the sudden urge to just leap out the window, he shot up and looked out the window to the deck below, challenging anyone to look at him.

No one was there.

Confused and slightly miffed, Zoro scanned the deck for any sign of his crew mates. He was about to give up and take his frustration out on the weights once more until the open door of the galley caught his eye.

He squinted. Had someone finally decided to make dinner?

Zoro's stomach growled.

"Ugh..."

He didn't want to go down there. He didn't want to be around the others at all but this lack of not knowing was killing him.

Ill at ease still, Zoro finally decided to head down from the crow's nest. Cautiously scaling the ladder he figured he couldn't go any longer without food anyway. The swordsman was starving and could probably devour an entire Sea King without the help of Luffy, thank you very much.


	6. Déjà vu

Hey guys, name change. Don't panic.

Also, I altered chapter four and five a bit. So, if you're too lazy to go back and read (I totally wouldn't) I'll just sum it up(from what I can remember); Zoro doesn't remember Helmepp-blah-blah and Sanji doesn't know/realize he was strangled. 'Kay?

* * *

"Sanji?"

The cook blinked sluggishly and turned to look at the little reindeer. Blue eyes met the small and curious brown ones. Chopper's blue nose twitched as Sanji only stared at him.

"How's your throat today?" Chopper asked, handing the cook a glass of water. "Did you sleep well last night?"

Sanji felt a twitch coming on in his brow. The reindeer had to be kidding. Between the collar and the pain, sleep was virtually unachievable. It was like trying to scratch your back in a place you can't reach.

Yesterday, Nami had said he was supposed to do all he could to see if Sanji was showing any signs of recovering his retention. It was also his job to help him remember anything and everything. He was also supposed to pay close attention to Sanji's behavior and every little reaction, especially if the topic of Zoro ever came up. Chopper wasn't that great of a person reader. Robin would have been a better choice for this but Sanji probably would have gotten suspicious. Maybe. If he wasn't busy trying to flirt.

"_So, basically, we have to subconsciously torture the man until he remembers. That's just fantastic."_

Berating the cook might send him spiraling into a mental breakdown or maybe a raging tangent. Either way, Chopper was sure Sanji could be pretty freaking scary.

Speaking of scary, Sanji was glaring at Chopper like he was insane.

"Oh... was that a dumb question?"

The cook graciously took the glass from the reindeer but didn't drink it, he let it rest on his abdomen, his fingers wrapped loosely around it. Blue eyes turned away from brown to stare at the wooden wall on the opposite side.

Chopper sighed quietly. The man hadn't even tried to communicate with them since yesterday. If he didn't want to talk, then he didn't want to talk. That was his decision. Well, not that he really had an _option_. . .

Maybe this was one of those signs he was suppose to pay attention to that Nami and Robin told him about. This sudden quietness and lack of activity were unusual and good to note. It may seem like a lack of want to talk, but Robin could probably decipher it into something much deeper than that. All he had to do was remember all the small little details of his expression-

Sanji's eyes were suddenly upon him again.

He didn't know when that happened, but he suddenly found himself feeling very uncomfortable under the man's gaze. The doctor had been in countless awkward situations when it came to patients. Unconscious patients were sometimes a good thing. It was only when they were conscious did the awkwardness get slightly out of hand. But as a doctor, Chopper had to do what he had to do, regardless of how awkward it got. However, sometimes, just sometimes, he disliked being a doctor because of moments like these.

It was a hallow and an unyielding stare that sent a chill down Chopper's spine.

"I-er... I'll just check back on you later." The young reindeer stammered. "Hope you feel better, Sanji."

As the door clicked shut behind the departing doctor, Sanji continued to stare at the wall. He tried to focus on the patterns in the wood, but his mind wanted to wander somewhere else.

'Hope you feel better, Sanji'. Feel better from what? What even happened for hims to feel this shitty?

Talking to someone wasn't the first priority on his list right now, a conversation with one of the others would only turn into a game of twenty to a million questions. He didn't want to answer questions someone else had for him. He wanted answers from himself. It was silly that he could hardly remember anything after lunch that day. Nothing violent seemed to have occurred such as a Marine attack or a fight with another vessel. A hurricane or some other storm seemed highly likely since they came and went on the sea without a trace. Yet Nami's usual call was absent in his mind. Did he fall down the stairs at some point? Did Luffy knock him off a great height? That wouldn't be surprising at all. Nor would it be a first. Or maybe he had gotten into a nasty fight with-

As disdainful as he was about talking to anyone, there was one face he was curious to see. Someone who hadn't come to see him yet. And for some reason, it made his heart throb slightly.

"_What are you doing in here? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"_

"_Blimey, if I knew you were gonna give me the Spanish Inquisition I wouldn't have gotten up." the man grumbled._

_One frowned at the other. "Alright, alright, but if I get hell from Chopper you're gonna get it from me. Do you even know what the Spanish Inquisition is?"_

"_Why do you always have to bitch at me?" _

"_I do not... "bitch" at you. It's just mildly expressed concern."_

"_You? Concerned about me?" the green haired man raised an eyebrow._

"_You wish." The blond scoffed. "I'm just bitching at you."_

"_Or spouting hot air."_

"_Get out."_

Stupid. He didn't care about that idiot. That man couldn't take anyone's concern without throwing it back in their face.

Then again... Sanji didn't like pity either.

It was another reason why he was glad to not talk to anyone. He didn't want their sympathy, especially if he didn't quite know the reason why they were giving it to him. He preferred them to be straightforward with him, it's not like he couldn't take it.

A slight twist in his chest made him flinch. His grip tightened on the glass.

Right?

* * *

~*(-LINE BREAK STOP TOYING WITH ME-)*~

* * *

"Nami, Sanji won't talk to me."

The navigator stared at the little reindeer, the slight breeze ruffled his fur. His little blue nose twitched twice before he sneezed.

She blinked. "But... I thought you said he couldn't talk for another day or so."

"I mean, he won't... " Chopper mused then shrugged. "I dunno... he doesn't seem to be acting like... himself."

"Well, acting like "himself" involves quite a bit of talking, Chopper."

"But he's..." he struggled to find the right words. "It seems like he's sulking."

"Um, well, you have seen that contraption you put on his neck, right?" Usopp asked warily. "He's probably pouting."

The reindeer frowned, it didn't seem like something to just brush off. Besides, Nami was the one who beat the dead horse in making sure that he watch Sanji closely, no matter how life threatening it got. You would think that considering how badly Nami and Robin wanted to know the truth, they would be the ones who should be watching Sanji. Then maybe they would have noticed the man's peculiar behavior and Chopper wouldn't be here trying to get the point across to them. The little doctor was quite curious as well, but just because he is a doctor doesn't mean patience is a virtue of his.

"Forget the collar. I think something else is on his mind." said the reindeer. "He's not pouting at me, he's being melancholy at something else."

"You think he remembers something?"

"Er... I'm not sure." Chopper shrugged. "I didn't get to ask."

"Well, why don't you go ask him?"

The reindeer was stupefied, to make up for his lack of a better response he just stared at Nami. She would know nothing of the intense gazes one gets when someone bothers the cook, because she's never under them. Chopper didn't want to disobey her. The navigator could give some scary glares herself, and had the bite to back them up, but he also didn't want to go back and see Sanji like that again. It wasn't the Sanji he knew and it scared him almost just as much as angry Nami did.

Chopper began to fidget. "Uhhh."

Luckily for Chopper there was a disturbance on deck as a certain captain decided to appear on the scene.

"Gimme candy!"

Luffy came zipping through, but was quickly brought to a halt by Nami's fist before he could cause any serious disruption.

"Hush, Luffy." She said. "You're not allowed to have sweets before meals anyway."

The little reindeer eyed Luffy with fear in his eyes. He could take quite a beating from the navigator, depending on how far he wanted to push for things and how angry Nami got.

"Anyway, you were saying, Chopper?"

"I... forget?" Chopper muttered, not taking his eyes off Luffy.

"Why don't you go ask Sanji if something is bothering him?"

"Uh, because... I value my life?"

"I thought there was candy here!" Luffy whined.

"Luffy, for the last time," came a gruff voice. "I told you that there was no candy."

Zoro came walking up the ramp, scratching his head and just finishing off a yawn. Nami glared at Luffy then to Zoro. She noticed that half her usual flare was missing when she tried to leer at the swordsman. She most certainly was not losing her touch and she certainly did not feel bad for said swordsman. That's what she kept telling herself.

"What did you tell him?"

"Zoro said that you had candy for me, Nami!"

"I did not." Zoro crossed his arms.

Luffy pouted. "Liar..."

The swordsman shot Luffy a dirty look, promising his death later.

Zoro's face was another thing that sometimes scared Chopper. He always looked so serious.

"Enough, you two." Nami rubbed her forehead. "Now is not the time to argue."

Zoro didn't protest as his eyes fell upon the little reindeer, lost in his musings of who had the more scary death glare.

A chill ran up the reindeer's spine as he realized the swordsman was gazing at him now. His expression bore a resemblance too Sanji's. He was getting tired of people staring at him like that. Chopper shook his head, blinking. "What's wrong, Zoro?"

The man hesitated slightly, he seemed unsure of himself. A few seconds pause and nothing more before he finally spoke. "How's..." He cleared his throat. "How is the cook doing?"

Usopp juggled his wrench to keep it from clattering to the deck after it had slipped from his grip. He was shocked by Zoro's question but pretended to not be listening. He was failing quite miserably.

Zoro didn't seem to notice as his gaze remained fixed upon Chopper. The man had already seen Sanji in the infirmary once, the morning his fever broke. Since then, he hadn't strayed near the sick bay. Even when Chopper informed him that Sanji had awoken, the swordsman still seemed apprehensive, more than he had been. It probably got even more strange for him when no one encouraged him to go see the cook.

"He... He's getting better." That was all Chopper could manage to say.

* * *

~*(-I'M HAVING PROBLEMS. LEAVE ME ALONE-)*~

* * *

A sudden heavy pressure on his chest caused Sanji to jerk back to consciousness. The glass he had forgotten about slipped to the floor from his abrupt movement. Funny, he didn't even remember drifting off. As Sanji sluggishly rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, becoming increasingly annoyed with the slight stinging, he remembered the sound of shattering glass he had heard only a few seconds ago.

He discovered the glass lying in pieces on the floor by the side of the bed. Great, someone was going to slip and fall and die on that, presumably him, if he was ever allowed to get out of this damn bed. Unfortunately he wasn't in any position to clean it up. That's what he got for falling asleep. . . Well, he could at least _attempt_ to pick up the pieces. The last thing he wanted was for Chopper to step on a shard of glass and get a cut.

But if he got up and out of bed Chopper would get angry with him. He didn't like to upset the reindeer, mainly because he couldn't stand the disappointed and/or worried looks he got from the doctor.

With much difficulty he shifted as close as he could to the edge of the bed and reached down to pick up the glass. Curse this stupid limb weakness. His head was tilted as far as he could go, no thanks to the stupid brace, but he was still flying blind due to the black spots in his eyes.

Shitty glass. Shitty neck brace. Shitty _life_.

It came to his attention that the spots were getting larger the longer he flailed at the ground. Not willing to lose consciousness now, he shifted into a more comfortable position to allow better circulation to his head. He didn't realize how sore his back had gotten from lying there until he tried to turn on his side, eliciting a muffled grunt from him.

Now he was fucking annoyed.

Even if he did managed to pick it up, where would he put it? There was a trash can next to Chopper's desk he could dump it in. That would require standing up, something he didn't feel like doing anymore.

He flopped back on the shitty bed, hand still draped over the edge, and stared irritably at what he wished was the floor. He felt the spilled water grace his fingertips.

Chopper's work desk suddenly disappeared as his vision blurred and the wooden walls morphed into tile. A shadow loomed above him.

A dull sound fell from the stranger's lips as the pressure that had jolted him earlier came back. A cold chill swept over him.

_No. No..._

The pressure increased as the shadow began to envelope him.

_What... what is this?_

"_Sanji..."_

He was shaking as his world was beginning to grow dark, a horrible sinking feeling set in the pit of his stomach.

"_Sanji."_

A numb feeling was overtaking him as the ringing in his ears took a back seat to the voice calling his name.

"Sanji!"

The numbness was receding as quickly as it had set in. Something brought him out of the dark as he came to realize that someone was shaking his shoulder lightly.

"Sanji!"

The tiled room faded and the familiar wooden ceiling of the sick bay melted back in to sight. An involuntary gasp escaped from him as he shot upright in the bed, or attempted to. The pressure on his chest disappeared in an instant but there was something pressing on his shoulder, trying to guide him back down to the sheets.

"Sanji! It's okay!" He heard Chopper's small voice say. "It's alright, just breathe."

The raspy and choked panting disagreed with Chopper's ears but it couldn't be helped. As long as the cook breathed... unlike how he found the man earlier; laying there, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling and not breathing.

"Are you okay?" The little doctor asked over the cook's heaving gasps.

A pregnant pause as Sanji took the time to catch his breath. He refused to look at the doctor, not wanting to meet his eyes. Chopper removed the brace around the man's neck, allowing him to breathe with a little more ease.

"Here, I'll get you some more water." The reindeer said eying the mess on the floor.

If he had been able to, Sanji would have stopped him but the doctor escaped between his fingers and left for the galley. He didn't want more water and nor did he want to be left alone again. Great, another glass for him to drop and-

"_;. . . . water?"_

Sanji didn't look back at the reindeer when he came trotting back in with a wooden mug.

* * *

~*(-I'M GOING TO MISS A LINE. WATCH ME-)*~

* * *

Zoro watched the clear liquid swirl in the mug he now held in his hand. After a long and angry bout of training, all he had said was "I'm thirsty" and a cup of water was shoved into his hands a few moments later by Luffy. Totally not odd.

"Hey, Zoro! Wanna play tag with me?"

The swordsman took a sip. "No."

"Aw, why not?" The boy pouted. "It's a fun game!"

"What are you, five years old?"

"But Zoro, I'm bored!"

Zoro felt his brow twitch. "Then go be bored somewhere else." He grumbled. "Besides, I told you I don't want to talk to anyone."

Luffy's smile faded a little. "What about me?"

Zoro shook his head. "When I say I don't want to talk to anyone, I mean I don't want to talk to anyone."

The boy stuck out his lower lip. "Well what if I said you had to speak to me, Captain's orders."

"Well, what would you want me to say?" Zoro snapped. "That's like forcing me to play a game I've never played before, I don't know the rules and I don't know how to play." The swordsman sighed, leaning forward on the railing. "I don't have anything to say to anyone since nobody has anything to say to me."

"What about Sanji?"

Zoro clutched the mug tightly, taken by surprise at such a simple question. He didn't want to respond to Luffy's inquiry, but his curiosity got the better of him. "What about him?"

"Would you talk to him?" Luffy asked simply.

The matter of whether or not he wanted to be stubborn or honest reared its ugly head in Zoro's face. Zoro was stubborn indeed, but he wanted, more than anything, to get this awful feeling off his chest.

That semi-serious look disappeared from Luffy's face as a broad grin took over. "That's okay, Zoro! You don't have to answer."

But what if he wanted to answer?

It was almost like the boy was teasing him, asking questions like that and then retracting them. It made him think about what he didn't want to think about. Everyone had been dancing around the subject of Sanji, especially around him. He was getting tired of it. He already knew the answer, but he desperately wanted someone to tell him otherwise. Then again, no matter how long he waited, there was no way anyone could tell him something different if he didn't voice his conclusion first. It was clear the others were afraid to tell him something. Maybe they feared they were wrong about their answers.

Or, they were afraid they were right.

"Luffy. I think I. . ." He paused.

The boy waited patiently for him to continue.

He knew that in no way was he directly responding to Luffy's question, but there wasn't anything else he wanted to talk about. If there was ever an opportunity to talk about this, to get it off his chest, now was the time. To be honest, he didn't think the cook would even want to talk to him, not after what he did.

"I think I did something terrible." He swallowed. "I think I'm the one who hurt Sanji."

* * *

As much as Sanji was against wasting food, there were times where it was forgivable to pass up a meal. For instance, he just could not bring himself to eat a single bite of the soup that was brought before him. All Sanji could do was poke at it with his fork and stare at it. He just didn't feel like stomaching anything at the moment. Technically, he wouldn't be wasting it if he gave it to Luffy. That boy would devour anything placed before him on a plate.

Chopper observed him steadily. "Don't tell me you're not hungry. You barely ate anything for breakfast, now you're not going to eat your lunch?"

Sanji shook his head.

How could he eat anything anyway when Chopper was watching him like that? It's creepy. . .

"_Not going to eat?"_

"_I don't want it. . ."_

"_C'mon, Chopper says you need to eat something. Eat up. I went out of my way to make this for you."_

"_Well, you wasted your time, shitty cook, I don't want it-."_

"Hm, I suppose you could use some fresh air."

Chopper's voice cut through Sanji's thoughts like a knife and brought him back to the present.

"Tell you what, Sanji," Chopper continued, unaware that the man had been spacing out, "If you're feeling up to it, you can get out of bed."

Those were the very words Sanji usually wanted to hear, more than anything, whenever he was bed ridden. His initial reaction was to be excited, but that feeling of eagerness couldn't replace the strange depression that had suddenly taken a hold of him.

He only stared back at his plate of untouched food.

The doctor blinked and tilted his head. He had gone and spoiled the man with his permission to get out of bed, but he hadn't gotten the reaction he expected. He had been so sure that would get a positive response out of the cook, but the man was still so lifeless.

It was a slight surprise when Sanji slipped out from under the sheets, bowl still in hand. He was a bit shaky on his feet at first, but managed to stabilize himself. After slipping on the shoes at the foot of the bed, he made his way to the galley. Chopper followed close behind him.

Seven heads turned, and all eyes were on the blond. He ignored the confused gazes and approached Luffy, holding his plate out to him.

"Oh, Sanji, you're up?" He looked to the plate. "Is this for me? Thanks!"

The boy took the dish immediately and slurped it down in record time.

Luffy let out a rather obnoxious belch. "Ah. Sanji, since you're walking again, does this mean you'll start cooking meals now? Because, honestly, I'm getting sick of Usopp's bad tasting food."

"Hey!" The marksman interjected, but was ignored overall.

The cook gave his captain a thumbs up.

"Alright!" Luffy cheered.

"Whew, that's a relief." Nami sighed, Robin chuckled behind her hand.

Sanji turned and headed back in to the sickbay.

"Oi, Cook bro, don't you want to eat with us?"

He looked back to the others that were blatantly staring at him, all except for one who he refused to look at. Odd, normally he didn't have a problem with glaring _him_ down, but he just couldn't bring himself to look in his eyes.

The cook shook his head and, with a steady gait, he walked into the sickbay. The pressure of just being in that room was something he couldn't handle at the moment. He pretended not to notice Chopper's concerned look as he made his way to the door on the opposite side of the medical room to step outside.

There was a bright flash before his eyes adjusted to the sudden exposure to sunlight. The blond savored the cool breeze that met him as he stepped outside. The wind brushed against his face and through his hair, easing his troubled mind. It was nice to smell the ocean again without the sterile scent of the infirmary mixed in it. Despite the slight burning sensation in his throat, he felt quite relaxed.

The feeling did not last long before certain thoughts invaded his mind once again.

That awkward silence had been present in the galley when he entered. He had felt a specific pair of eyes upon him that he could not meet.

He _wanted_ to look at them. He just _couldn't_ look at them. Something crept up his chest every time he even _thought_ about those eyes.

This game of subtle secrecy was getting on his nerves. He hadn't forgotten those questions they had asked him when he woke up. And what about _him_? Why hadn't _he_ been there asking questions?

"Sanji?"

He turned to see the little doctor poking his head out the door. After a failed attempt to ask 'What?' he settled with an inquiring stare.

"I know I've been asking you a lot lately, but I just want to make sure. Are you sure you're feeling alright?"

Alright? What was "alright" about any of this?

_A scoff. "That's too bad now, isn't it? You gotta eat it or else Chopper will come in here and force feed it to you. Given your condition I don't think you could fight back."_

"_Go away."_

"_Look, would you just take it so we can both get on with our lives?"_

"_If this is such a burden to you then why are you here?" The man snapped._

"_Because you would do the same for me." Was the confident reply._

_An agonizing silence._

"_Wouldn't you?"_

_No response from the other man._

_The fork slipped from the plate of food in his hand and clattered to the floor._

Oh.

"Sanji?" He heard the concern rise in Chopper's tone. "Sanji! Are you ignoring me on purpose?"

The cook emitted a wheezy laugh and flashed a fake smile at the doctor to reassure him.

"Hmph." Chopper crossed his arms, obviously not believing him. "Alright. You had better eat something at dinner, Mister!"

Sanji just mentally shook his head at Chopper's motherly attitude.

His hand found its way back up to his throat. It was still pretty sore and felt tender against his fingertips no matter how gentle he was. Now that he thought about it, he still didn't know what his "injury" looked like.

With an idea in his head, he turned to Chopper and motioned to the bathroom. The reindeer blinked, looking between him and in the direction he was pointing in.

"What? You need to go?"

Sanji nodded.

"Do you need me to escort you?"

He gave the reindeer an incredulous look.

"Okay! Okay! Just be careful. If you get dizzy on your way up just stop. Don't try to move or you could fall and injure yourself further."

The cook waved his hand as he left.

* * *

Zoro forked his food but did not raise it to his mouth. He didn't want to eat, not when it felt like everyone was staring at. No matter how many times he looked up, he didn't catch any of their gazes upon him. It still felt like he was being watched though.

When the cook had come into the galley he couldn't help himself. He stared at the blond when he silently approached the captain. As blatantly obvious as he had been, Sanji didn't seem to take notice of Zoro's gaze. He came and then left without a word or even a second glance. Not once did he look at him.

That uncomfortable feeling in his chest grew stronger upon seeing the other man again. It tugged at him relentlessly when the cook came back in and disappeared up the ladder. It seemed slightly unnatural that he had a smile on his face. The others didn't pay much attention to him, but the few glances that were cast in Sanji's direction seemed. . . apprehensive.

His conversation with Luffy weighed heavily on his mind. Not only did the boy already know what Zoro had done, but his fears and suspicions had been confirmed. It had happened. It really happened. It drove him insane that he didn't know why it happened though. What had set him off? Luffy said he had a high fever during that time, which must have been the reason why he didn't remember it too well, but. . .

He pushed his plate forward and excused himself.

* * *

Getting up to the bathroom proved to be quite a task. He probably wouldn't be going back down anytime soon. A wave of dizziness struck him as he was entering the library.

As he was sitting on the bench he felt his hand upon his throat once more. Fingers trailed along the sides of his neck, grazing over what felt like small abrasions.

"_Hey, Sanji, can you do me a big favor?"_

"_Sure, Chopper. What do you need?"_

"_Weell, I need you to help Zoro up to the bath house and uh. . . um."_

"_. . . Play lifeguard?"_

"_Y-Yeah. Could you do that for me?"_

"_. . ."_

He remembered Chopper requesting that of him just after lunch. Then he had. . . taken the swordsman up to the bath house, with much difficulty, and then. . .

Then what happened?

The dizzy spell passed, allowing him to scale the ladder to the bathroom.

His eyes immediately fell upon what he had been looking for, but he was a bit surprised at what he saw.

There, in the bathroom mirror, he spotted his reflection. It was foreign to him at first, but after blinking a few times he came to recognize his own face. Once again, he reached up to feel the scratches on his scratches and tracked the bruise lines on his neck.

What the. . . ?

The bruise patch on his throat had such a distinct shape to it. It was shaped kind of like a hand. . .

"_Oi, you thirsty? Chopper asked me to bring you some water."_

_No reply._

"_He also asked me to take you to the bath house, so. . . Let's get this over with."_

_Once again, no reply._

"_Come on, you could at least attempt to get up." The cook grunted as he looped an arm beneath the swordsman's shoulder blades._

"_What the hell are you doing?"_

"_What Chopper asked me to, weren't you listening?"_

"_Put me down!"  
"No. Do I have to knock you out and drag you there? Quit squirming so much!"_

"_I'm fine on my own, shit cook. Let me go!"_

_He released the other man, who slumped back on the bed and made a pitiful attempt to get up._

"_You sure you don't need help? Don't want you falling over board or down the stairs-."_

"_God, do you ever shut up? I hate your fucking voice so much! Sometimes I just want to throttle you just so you'd stop talking!"_

"_. . ."_

"_Just do everyone a favor and stop talking forever!"_

"_. . . Ugh, well. . . Unfortunately for you, that isn't going to happen any time soon-"_

The sudden ringing inside his ears disrupted the memory.

* * *

"So, what's the deal, Chopper?" Usopp asked. "How's Sanji doing?"

"I don't think he's remembered anything yet." The reindeer sighed. "But he's been spacing out a lot lately and he keeps touching his neck. He needs to stop doing that. What about Zoro?"

"He talked to me about it." Luffy immediately said.

Everyone looked at him.

"What? He did? What did he say?"

Luffy pursed his lips and turned his head away. "I'm not telling."

"Luffy!" Nami reached over and slapped the raven haired boy.

Luffy's somewhat childish response sent a wave of relief through Robin. Their captain was no longer worried about what happened. Whatever he had heard from Zoro it must have eased his mind a bit. Then there was no need to dwell about the past any longer.

Nami continued to slap the young man but Luffy refused to tell them.

"C'mon, Luffy, I wanna know too!"

"All you guys need to know is that Zoro would never hurt his friends." Luffy said with a pouting face.

"Intentionally." Robin added with a calm smile.

"Oi, Robin! You know too? Be a dear and tell your beloved sister." Nami begged.

"What do we do now that Zoro remembers, Luffy?"

The boy hesitated then simply said. "Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Nothing. We just let Zoro and Sanji work it out."

"I suppose it is a good idea that we don't interfere. . . especially if there is no danger of this completely destroying their friendship, but. . ." Franky scratched his brow. "But what if Curly Brow doesn't want to talk to him?"

"He will talk to Zoro." Luffy said with undying confidence. "I know he will."

"Well, he may not be able to talk for another day. . ." Chopper mumbled.

"Where is Sanji-san, Chopper?" Brooke asked.

"He's up in the bathroom." Chopper shrank a bit under all the looks he was getting. "What? You think that's a bad idea? I can't just keep him from going to the bathroom! Not only is it cruel and unusual punishment, but do you have any idea how bad it is for men to hold it in-?"

"Doctor-san, he's more likely to remember what happened if he's in the place where it occurred." She stated. "That familiar feeling will probably make him remember what happened. Similar to Déjà vu."

". . . And that's a bad thing?"

"With a traumatic experience? It could be." Robin simply shrugged. "You'll probably find out soon enough."

"Why are you so blunt?"

Chopper was already scaling the ladder with increasing speed and muttering things under his breath.

"So, Luffy," Nami sighed. "What do we do now?"

"Nothing." The captain said.

"Still nothing?"

"Yup." He grinned. "Hey, Usopp, want to see who can catch the biggest fish? I bet Sanji will cook it for us."

* * *

It was bad enough he was kneeling on the floor, clutching his head in agony, but to have been found this way was even more embarrassing. Someone was standing beside him with their hands on his back. They were saying something but the sound was muffled under the ringing in his ears. The sudden headache pounded against Sanji's skull unmercifully as memories, that he could not quite grasp, flooded back to him.

"_What do you mean. . .? Whatever, just get in. . ."_

"_;. . .my swords?"_

"_What did you just call me. . .?"_

"Ugh. . ." He shook his head.

What was this all about? What swords?

"_;. . . where you left them, okay?"_

"_;. . . always lie! . . . I'll make you tell me!"_

"_Look, I'm not-"_

"_Tell me!"_

That voice. . .

"Oi!"

The ringing took a back seat to the voice that had come from above. Someone was still knelt beside him on the tiled floor.

"_;. . . get rid of you. . . in the way."_

A pair of piercing eyes gazed down at him.

"_Say goodbye,-."_

Zoro.

Their eyes locked for a brief moment. Sanji tried to hold his gaze but the hand resting just below the base of his neck was too much. Panic rose in his chest and the need to escape was dire. He pulled back from the stunned man. He lost his balance and fell unceremoniously on his rear.

Confusion was clear in the other's eyes but all Sanji could see was that leering gaze. It was suffocating him.

"Sanji. . ." Zoro started, reaching out a hand to the blond.

The cook threw up an arm in defense and scrambled backwards, away from the swordsman.

That hand. That outstretched hand. It was choking him.

The pressure on his throat. . . it was unbearable. He had to get away. He had to or else this pressure would crush him.

His back was suddenly against the wall, leaving him with no where else to go. No escape.

Chopper had just barely made it to the bath house ladder when he heard Zoro shout to him from above.

"Hm? Zoro?" He looked up. "What are you doing-?"

"Get up here quickly!"

Oh dear Lord, no. Don't let it be that Robin was right. Please don't let it be so.

As Chopper raced up, he found himself getting a bit sick of climbing all these ladders today and almost slipping and falling to his doom.

Zoro was close by the ladder entrance, but his gaze was not focused on the reindeer. He was looking at the erratically breathing blond sitting across the room from him with deep concern.

"Oh, no. . . Sanji!"

Suddenly in his human form, Chopper managed to pry Sanji's hand away from his throat. His breathing fared no better, and only grew worse from short respiration to ragged gasping that tore the swordsman's ears.

"Sanji! Can you hear me? Sanji, answer me! Sanji!"

* * *

A panic attack. A God damn panic attack.

If Franky hadn't already fixed the tiles, Zoro would have punched out every single one of them.

That fear in the man's eyes, it had been directed at _him_. Sanji had been afraid of _him_.

"Damn it. . ." Zoro bowed his head.

He was still sitting on the bathroom floor even after they had left. The sight of Chopper guiding Sanji out, with his hands over his eyes, was burned into his mind when he moved out of their way.

It was just a mistake. A mistake. He didn't know Sanji was in here. He didn't realize Sanji would ever be _that_ afraid of Zoro. Had it really been that traumatizing for him? He seemed to be doing so well earlier. . .

Or did he only have panic attacks when he looked at Zoro?

Oh, to whatever deity may exist, please don't let it be that.

That frightened Sanji had left Zoro feeling more helpless than he had ever felt in a long time. Truth be told, he was also scared. He was scared by how fragile the man appeared to be for what seemed like a split second.

It was just an accident. He didn't want it to turn out like this.

Would Sanji forever cringe in his presence?

"I've done it now, Luffy." Zoro said in a raspy voice.

As silently as he had come in, Luffy stepped forward and placed a firm hand on the swordsman's shoulder.

"I think I just made him re-live what happened." He said in a hopeless tone. "What am I going to do now?"

Luffy was quiet for a moment before deciding to speak. "Don't give up."

Zoro sighed exasperatedly. "Then what? Terrorize him even more?"

"You just gotta keep trying, Zoro." Luffy said. "You're giving just as much effort as he is just to talk."

The first mate looked up. "What? You mean he. . . ?"

"Sanji's been wondering where you are, and why you didn't come to see him when everyone else did." Luffy said with a wide smile. " You just caught him by surprise when he was up here, that's all."

Sanji _did_ want to see him?

"Just by surprise. . ." Zoro mused. "So, there's still a chance."

"There's always a chance!" Luffy gave the man a hearty slap on the back. "You just gotta know when the right time is!"

The right time.

"Oh, by the way, Nami says she's willing to subtract from your debt if you come down from here."

* * *

Sanji was rather regretful about skipping lunch. He was wishing he hadn't decided to give Luffy his soup then. His stomach could use something to fill it; rather than this acidic, gnawing feeling he was left with after his little fit in the bath house. Exhaustion was taking over him and beckoning him to sleep, but he feared to close his eyes in case he should see. . .

Damn it, that was just mortifying, especially in front of _him_.

As embarrassing as it was, he couldn't shake the memory of the intense feeling of terror he had experienced in there. He didn't want to feel that ever again; that state of mind where you feel as though you're trapped inside of yourself, and you cannot escape no matter where you run or hide.

What weighed heavily on his mind the most were the memories that had flashed in his mind. What were they?

His temple throbbed angrily in protest.

"_Just do everyone a favor and stop talking forever!"_

Stop talking forever. . .

"Here you go, Sanji." Chopper held out a cup of water and a few pills to the cook. "This should ease the pa. . . Sanji? Sanji! What's wrong?"

The cook blinked in surprise at his own tears now rolling down his face, trickling into the angry red scratches still evident on his throat.

* * *

Sorry, it's been forever since I updated. This chapter was sitting on my computer and rotting with just 2,000 and some words to it. I just couldn't get this to go anywhere until now. I apologize for the ridiculous line breaks, they were giving me serious issues.

Also, I've been having the most shit-tastic week ever, so it's got some angst and OOCness.

It is now two thirty in the morning. Brb, sleeping for days.


End file.
